Lord Noel's News Flash

Whatto! Earthlings..................

I was lying in our jacuzzi last night with my good Lady wife..........

.....looking up at the night sky.........

.....and contemplating all the millions of stars above us............

......which, thanks to the lack of public facilities out here in the countryside......

.....were all very clearly visible............

When I suddenly saw a beautiful shooting star flash across the night sky.......

.......and remembered that I had some important news for her......

....which I'd neglected to impart........

This was most remiss of me........

......as it was, and IS, extremely important!

And it concerns EVERYONE living on planet EARTH!

Yes!.....

I discovered the other day...... news of an ancient prediction...........

....that the Earth will be coming to an end!

.......and it's actually a lot sooner than I thought!

To be precise..............

.....it's the time of the Winter Solstice of 2012!

This was predicted long, long ago, by the enigmatic Mayan culture.......

(and if you haven't yet seen 'Apocalypto'.....why not?)

.....who recorded them in their beautifully intricate........

...... and incredibly accurate stone carvings......

....and it's also in literature too........

.....namely the 'Popol Vuh'!

These ancient people have consistently predicted all the changing celestial conditions that have occurred since that time.......with incredible accuracy.............

.....and scientists now agree that on November 21st 2012 there will again be a change of great significance!

So........We can't say we weren't warned!

I suppose........... all the signs have been there for us all to see for some time now.......

Perhaps we've been ignoring them?.....

....or perhaps we chose NOT to see them.......

...preferring instead to contemplate our ever expanding navels.....

.....as the World sinks further into decline.......

...at the hands of human kind.......

.......turning our back on nature......

.....at our peril!

I'm sure a lot of Christians will be pleased that their 'Armageddon' will have finally arrived!

It would certainly resolve all the confusion which has existed up to now...

Many of them believe we have all neglected 'GOD' for too long.....

......and have replaced him with the 'false Gods'......

....... of fame.......

.......money........

........ and drugs .............

There will no doubt be a great deal of 'I told you so!' going on......

....especially on the internet.....

.....where we all spend FAR too much time.......

.......in our 'virtual' reality........

.........when we could be outisde.......

......enjoying the 'real' thing!

Amongst all the 'gnashing of teeth'....

...... the plagues.....

......the fire and brimstone.........

....and all the natural disasters going on at the time.....

....some of us will be joining the angels......

....who've been patiently awaiting our arrival for quite some time.

Of course.....there are those who say..........

....... it's all just a load of 'round things'..............

....spinning silently in space...............

.....and that absolutely nothing will happen......

.....and to be fair........

......they have been right so many times in the past.......

.....so maybe they'll be right again?......

Who knows?.........

.....but one thing's for sure.......

.....we all have to go sometime.............

.....and some people may actually find it comforting............

....to know the exact date.......

......... that they'll finally slide down......

...... into the 'jaws of death'.......

.....that way they can get their 'affairs' in order........

......pay up the electricity bills..........

.....cancel their newspapers.......

.....and arrange their 'last supper'

All I can say is.....

......"any excuse for a party!"

Tallyho!
Best wishes - Lord Noel