Lord Noel Eats It Up

What ho! pepys...

Last night (during a discussion over dinner) my dear wife Lady Jacqueline had the audacity to call me pretentious!
I almost choked on my Balsamic Glaze!

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel Is Puzzled

What ho! Pepys...

Those of you who know of my good wife Lady Jacqueline will also be aware of her addiction to puzzles of any kind (some unkind persons say that's why she became married to moi in the first place).
In times gone by it was the reliable old Crossword book which took pride of place within her delicate mitt, with her trusty biro always at the ready to fill in the small regular shaped boxes surrounded by the black squares of nothingness. Well readers I am pleased to say that she has finally abandoned the Crossword! Yes! I can honestly say that for the past month there hasn't been a crossword between us.
She has found instead that the internet provides a regular and relentless queue of like-minded oddballs willing and able to submit to the online pleasures of an altogether more cerebral game.....
The game I speak of is....Scrabble! I believe she may have now taken this up Professionally as she often plays this game for hours on end each day.
Yesterday I decided to try to distract her from her growing compulsion by playing on her baser womanly desires as I whispered passionately in her ear "Lady Jacqueline, what is your favourite position for Sex!?"...
...to which she replied "With the X on the Triple word score!"

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel - Travelling Medic

What ho! Pepys...

Lady Jacqueline and I have recently made a momentous step forward in our travel arrangements.
Gone are the expensive package deals to far away continents (for the time being anyway) as we have decided to explore the beauty of jolly old Englandia and that of nearby Europia - a mere stones throw (if you are throwing the said stones from a nuclear powered rocket launcher) and ferry ride away from our humble place of abode.
To help us in our quest allow me introduce our chaperon 'LANCE'...
Take a bow LANCE....

 These pics were taken just after we arrived home with Lance so the inside was 'as we found it'

It has lots of Mod Cons!  Why even the doors close!

This is what I like to call our fitted living bed dining kitchen room 

Aha! I've found somewhere quiet to sit (after we've finished driving - although having experienced some of Lady Jacqueline's driving maybe I'll sit here ALL the time)

 I can just imagine Lady J and myself cooking our Lobster thermidor right here - or perhaps even the fingers of fish....how exotic!

Our front door! Where we can greet visitors and exit to explore the outside world after a nourishing sleep on the cleverly designed sleeping platform!

These are the kind of steps one needs to take in order to explore Europia.

Here one can see another clue of Lance's previous life....
Lady J says this will come in very handy when my new trolley stretcher arrives (though why anyone would want to stretch a trolley is beyond me)

 As one can see the previous owners were fastidious in their arrangements for filing everything away in it's proper place...they even created these handy removable drawers

 The indoor loo cupboard even has facilities for installing state of the art TV equipment! (For those 'extra long visits' or for watching the Olympics whilst jettison ones fingers of fish)
Below one can observe a pleased and very proud new owner - surveying her newly cleansed travelhome!

And although I'm not a real Doctor - I've no doubt that whilst I'm living within such a reassuring structure...
 I'm bound to catch the odd punter who wants some of my magical potions or free medical advice

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel Says Roll On 2012!

What ho! Pepys...

Out with the old and in with the new...preferably on a nice warm beach!

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline

Lady Jacqueline Gets Invited Out

Whatto! Peeps.....

'Hairsuite Henrietta'  - A founding member of our local 'Hair Lovers Club'

Lady Jacqueline has been invited to a rather unique Party run by some rather unique local ladies.....
....who all belong to an Ancient Order known locally as the 'Hair Lovers Club'.
I think it was started long, long ago by a Lady who was German or perhaps French...
...but let's just say that local sales of razors and scissors plummeted.
Many of the Men stopped shaving for several years so as not to be outdone by their lady folk.
Some of our village's older inhabitants can still remember what they refer to as the vicious 'Scissor Riots'....
...when naturally balding people were hounded out of the area or forced against their wills to wear grotesque hair pieces.
Eventually a nasty infestation of nits put pay to the 'Hairy Superiority' and indeed ideas of having longer hair fell into disrepute and peace descended on our village once more.All in all, a nasty episode in the annuls of local history and a chapter that many people would prefer not to  remember.
So the club continues to be run but on a far more clandestine level, where members meet in secret and use various different secret plaits to identify rank or seniority within the group.
On Lady Jacqueline's Invitation it's billed as a 'Hair Washing Party'....
....so now she can't think of an excuse not to go!

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

Lord Noel Makes A Visit to the Dentist

Whatttttto!! Wonderful ones!

Aren't Teeth a wonderful thing?......

........many of my ancestors would have found a variety of good uses to put them to .....

....as they made their way here from Transylvania ..

A very good and beautiful friend of ours today went to the Dentist to undergo some major Dental work and it reminded me of the time that I too went to visit such an establishment accompanied by my good wife - Lady Jacqueline.....

On entering I was instantly reassured by the fine array of modern equipment laid out before us........

........And as we were shown into the dentist's surgery I immediately made it absolutely clear that I was in a big hurry. So I told him straight "No expensive extras, Doctor," and continued uninterrupted, "No gas or needles or any of that fancy stuff. Just pull the tooth and get it over with."

The Dentist's eyes opened and I could see he was impressed with my forthrightness. He smiled admiringly and said "I wish more of my patients were as strong minded and as brave as you, Lord Noel." Then he added "Now, which tooth is it?"

I then turned to my wife Lady Jacqueline and said "Show him your tooth, Darling!"

Har!!

Tallyho everyone!

Best wishes - Lord Noel