Lord Noel Says - New Position Available Now!

Whatto! Job seekers.....

I have been enjoying my well-deserved retirement from The Foreign Office for some time now.....

But a position recently advertised has tempted me back into the world of Employment.

I would be working for a major university as a researcher.......

......adding academic prestige to my already extremely glamourous life.

If you think you're man or woman enough to handle a tough job like that then you need to contact Leeds University's School of Sociology and Social Policy because they're the ones advertising the position.

The government-funded position will see the successful applicant interviewing 300 people in two northern English towns. The study, which comes with a salary of £31,513, is aimed at finding out who takes on specific work in the area and what their working conditions are like.

So essentially .......

....you'll be working deep inside the entertainment Industry.......

...because it also links in with research into how the number of bars in the area have multiplied....

By now you'll be wanting to know who the target group are.....

...Well I can tell you.......

....because the target group are....

...LAP DANCERS!

The ad simply reads: "Research Officer: The rise and regulation of lap dancing and the place of sexual labor and consumption in the night time economy".....

....it also states that the successful applicant will need to have "prior experience of conducting research in the female sex industry".

I believe that I possess the qualifications necessary for this grueling and demanding job of interviewing scantily clad, fit women in night clubs.......

...... and I also believe that I could easily qualify ipso facto for this unique, prestigious and difficult, yet important research because of my general worldliness and obvious breeding.

And before I hear the usual wave of criticism from all those nambypamby doogooders out there, squawking about "What a waste of taxpayers' money this is!".......

........I ask of them........

...... just one question.

 Are you Sociologists?

.....No.

Then Tallyho!

Are you a lap dancing researcher?

Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline

Dress With Finesse