Wednesday 22 August 2007

Lady J Is CHILLED....




Well...today I awoke with my glass of champers & breakfast in bed...my maid opened the curtains to the same drizzle outside, this has been my awakening for almost a week now...the weather is simply Ghastly! Of course I had to do something about this utterly depressing state of affairs, so I had my secretary make me an urgent appointment for a relaxation session at my fav beauty salon.

My Mother, bless her, has recently had a "hip op" (no, this is not a dance...apparently it's when one has one's hip replaced) and she was feeling quite similar....so I took her along for a little therapy too!

We had the most marvellous time! ~My usual room was taken (no doubt by Lady Snooty from the manor close by) so the room allocated was somewhat smaller, reminded me of a windowless cell, but the ambiance was fitting.

First I had the most exhilarating exfoliating back scrub, followed by a sensual massage. Then the pretty little thing, massaged my legs & finally manipulated my aching feet (& believe me, they WERE aching! I had traipsed around the entire city with my Mother & had to carry my OWN shopping ~ Damn butler is away looking after his sick mother, lord knows ~ it's fruitless, the old dear is obviously next to death, perhaps I should recommend my physician, dear Dr. Shipman Jnr. he took care of my last butlers mother a treat!)

Anyway, I diverse!

After our frivolous little treat & bags of shopping later, we decided to head back to the manor...My chauffeur had "knocked off" to go get his teeth fixed, leaving us effectively stranded! We had to go on one of those large tin thingys...a BUS! It was excruciating, all the seats were taken and we were forced to stand with our hands in cuff like devices! There was a brutish looking young gentlemen opposite me, and when the vehicle took a particularly sharp bend, I was thrown (with some force!) with my face, firmly embedded into his moist, stiff, private area! Naturally, I was horrified! It took me 40 minutes to compose myself and become upstanding again.


I've made another booking with the beauty salon, and made my chauffeur an appointment to have all his front knashers veneered to a marble finish....Apparently this is likely to take several hours a week to complete, but I do so believe in giving my staff the best...just such a shame he won't be available to collect me from my weekly beauty therapy trip ;-)

Oh! What a day, after such an ordeal, I feel deserving of a glass of champers and a hot bubbly bath!

Bye for now,
Lady J
x

1 comment:

brown eyed girl said...

I really enjoyed reading this blog and keep checking daily in the hope that perhaps the lady may write another post for me to read, ive even purchased some earl grey tea to sip while i read happily...
My partner would like me to be a little more elegant too, so i thought it was a good start..lol
xxx