Lord Noel's Visit To Santa

What ho! Santa fans................

Around this time of year................

People celebrate the 'Season of Goodwill' in interesting ways............

it crosses parents minds...............even though the rest of the year they may be 'perfectly good parents'..........
to 'treat' their kids...............
to a surprise visit to Santa!!
Now...........Being a kid..........
you probably won't have met Santa before...............
but it's nothing to worry about...............

he's just a big fat chap.............
in a bright red furry suit............
with long white hair...............
......and ..........er.........make-up...........
and a long white beard...............
although not always..............
In 'Santas world' you must always be prepared for the unexpected!........
Oh yes! ...and he sits on a big throne............and he lives in a place called a 'Grotto'...........
which is normally at the North Pole...............
a freezing cold hostile place!................ (before global warming)...........
but it can be in virtually any department store too!.............
and he can be at twenty or more stores at exactly the same moment............
.........a bit like GOD I suppose?!
And you can usually tell where his Grotto is..............
because there'll be signs warning you..............
and it's usually a really tacky place...............
with bright flashing coloured lights........... and the sounds of childrens voices!

Anyway...... he lives in his Grotto with lots of Elves and fairies..............
who are his slaves...............
and he makes them work really long hours for HIM.............
to wrap up all the presents............... that YOU keep demanding all year long...............
and they probably don't even get paid any wages!..........
and get very little food.............
just enough to keep them alive!.............so they can keep working for him............
probably eating boiled fish EVERY day!............
because that's all they live on in the North Pole!............and they can't escape because of the freezing cold weather there................
and if you go towards him...............
he will grab you in his arms........... and hold you tight................and he won't let you go!..........
and he'll say over and over to you.....in a BIG BOOMING voice!......."Ho! Ho! Ho!" (unless you live in Sydney Australia).......
and he'll make you sit on his lap...............(if he's been checked out properly by 'The Authorities')...................and he'll ask you all sorts of personal questions..............

......like "What would you like for Christmas little boy/girl?"
and it's okay you can talk to him...............
even though your parents normally tell you NOT to talk to strangers..........
HE'S different............
oh yes....he's different...............and if you're 'good'...............
he will give you presents!..........
EVERYTHING you desire!...............

Just imagine that!..............EVERY kind of toy you can think of!!!!!...........but if you're BAD................ he'll give you a piece of COAL!!!!.............
and what use is a piece of COAL to a child?..............

No USE at all!...............
it just reminds you of 'Global Warming' doesn't it?!..............
Yes! A 'Visit to Santa' is a truely MAGICAL experience!.............try it some time soon...........
It certainly did me no harm!.....
and your parents can photograph that 'Magic Moment' for you to keep......
and tell you later on what fun it was!......

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/entertainment/holiday/sfl-scaredofsanta-ugc,0,7181908.ugcphotogallery

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline
Dress With Finesse