Sunday, 4 January 2009

Lord Noel On Special Agent Selection

Whatto! everyone................
During my time at the UK's Governments Foreign Office..............

................I was often allowed automatic 'Top Level' clearance whilst visiting other Countries............
I remember my time in America with particular fondness.............
I was priviliged enough to be present whilst selection procedures were undertaken at the CIA for agents...............
On the day of my arrival the 'Selectors' told me they had already completed all the background checks, interviews, and testing and they were down to three finalists..................
...........Two men and a woman.
I was facinated to see how their processes differed from our own!
For the final test, the 'Selectors' took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a handgun.............
They yelled at him "Candidate! We MUST know that you will follow ALL instructions!................ no matter what the circumstances.............Is that understood?"
"YES SIR!" came the barked reply...............
They continued..........."Inside this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair................ YOU MUST Kill Her!!!"
The man immediately said "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife!"
The Selector just smiled and took the hand gun from him saying "Then Candidate, you're not the right man for this job!"
The Candidate was led away.............that was the end of the procedure for him................
The second man was then given the same instructions................
He actually took the gun and went into the room...............
All was quiet for about five minutes..............
........and I listened intently for sounds of activity...........
Then the man came out with tears in his eyes!
He blurted out "I'm Sorry, I tried, but I just can't kill my wife!"
The Selector again said, "Then you don't have what it takes Candidate!............... Take your wife and go home!"
........they were led away............
and I was beginning to wonder whether ANYONE would pass such a severe test!?...........
Finally, it was the woman's turn.............

She was given the same instructions to kill her husband...................
Grimly, she took the gun and went into the room................
I then heard several loud shots, one after another!...............
Then screaming!..........then a terrible crashing and banging on the walls!...........
After what seemed like several minutes, all was quiet..............
The door opened slowly and there stood the woman!.............
She wiped the sweat from her brow, and said, "This gun is loaded with blanks................
.............so I had to beat him to death with the chair!"

Have you ever had to beat a close relative to death with a household implement?

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline
Dress With Finesse

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