Lord Noel on Holy Water

Whatto! Peeps.....

I'm sorry to report that a train has hit a bus load of nuns and they have all perished. 

They are went immediately to heaven where they are queuing up for the pearly gates.

As we all know 'Sex' is a sin to all Christians (unless it is for procreation - and even then it's frowned upon) and everyone in the queue who wants to get into Heaven has to first get past St.Peter - who, as we all know, is a stickler for the rules. 

St.Peter asks the first nun, "Sister Karen, have you ever had any contact with a man's genitalia?" 

She giggles and slyly replies "Well once I touched the head of one with the tip of my finger". 

St.Peter winces and shakes his head and says, "OK, dip the tip of your finger in the holy water and pass through the gate". 

St.Peter asks the next nun the same question, "Sister Elizabeth, have you ever had any contact with a man's genitalia?" The nun is a little reluctant but replies "Well once I fondled and stroked one". 

St.Peter looks aghast but says, "OK, dip your whole hand in the holy water and pass through the gate". 

All of a sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of nuns, one nun is pushing her way to the front of the line! 

When she reaches the front of the line St.Peter says "Sister, Sister! What seems to be the rush?" 

The nun replies "Well if I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to go before Sister Mary sticks her arse in it!!" 

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel