Lord Noel On Leaping The Pain Barrier

Whatto! Ill people...........
 
I went to my doctors yesterday.......
.......of course, being a man......
..... I never normally complain about pain........
.........unless it's really really bad........

.....and this just kept getting worse.............
...so I finally decided to seek the advice of an 'expert'.
I sat in the waiting room..........
....and waited......
......and waited.....


....and read through the myriad of ancient women's magazines that were lying about in there......
....and something I never ever see anywhere else.....
....'Reader's Digest' magazines.
I even did a survey.......


....... which proved that I am 'a caring and nurturing mother with strong maternal instincts'.
Eventually the tannoy rattled out my name.... as I was called through.
My Doctor was waiting in her office to see me.......
....she's a charming lady.....
...and I thought to myself "It's a shame that the only time I get to chat with her.........
....is when I'm not feeling too good".
"Hello Lord Noel" she said......
......"What seems to be the trouble?"
I told her "I seem to have a pain I can't get rid of".............
.....and she asked "Where exactly is the pain?"
"Well" I paused "I know this sounds odd, but I seem to hurt all over"
"What do you mean, 'all over'?" pressed the doctor........
....... "try to be a little more specific."
So I pointed to my right knee............
....touching it lightly...........
....."Ow, that hurts." I yelled...........
.........then I pointed to my left cheek.........
....and touched it softly...........
....yelling again, "Ouch! That hurts, too!"
Then I touched my right earlobe...............
......"Ow, even THAT hurts" I cried.
"Please Doctor!" I pleaded."You've got to help me!"
The doctor pondered me thoughtfully for a moment........
....... and then gave me her diagnosis..............
....."Lord Noel"....she said.............
........ "You have a broken finger."

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline