Saturday 25 June 2011

Lord Noel on Retirement

Whatto! Peeps..
 
Working people frequently ask retired people like myself...
"Lord Noel what do you do to make your days interesting and fun?" 
...and I just say "Life is meant to be enjoyed to the full" 
For example, the other day my Lady wife and I went into town to go shopping. 
We were only in the shop for about 5 minutes and when we came out...
... a uniformed Council Official was writing out parking tickets.
I went up to him, smiling my best smile and said, "How about giving a senior citizen a break?"
He ignored me and continued writing the ticket, so I called him a "Rotter!". 
He turned and glared at me and started writing another ticket...
...this time for having worn tires. 
So my wife called him a "Blasted trollop!". 
He finished writing the second ticket and put it on the windscreen with the first. 
Then he started writing a third ticket!
This went on for about 20 minutes....with me abusing him verbally in my own inimitable way..
...calling him a "Stench filled ass wiper!" a "Stem feeling buttock clencher!"...
... and a "Shirt-lifting fudge tunneller!"... 
And the more we abused him, the more tickets he wrote out...
Personally, we didn't care.
 
We came into town by bus...

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

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