Lord Noel on Ye Heayring Problym

What ho! Pepys...

From time to time even I, Lord Noel, have to drain our National Health system...

...this time I just had to go for a standard checkup.

Whilst I was there I confided to the Doctor that I thought my good Lady wife...

...might be losing her hearing.

The Doctor told me, "You could do a simple test...."

"Really?" I responded

"Yes" he continued "Just stand about 15 feet behind your wife and say 'Darling?'...

Then move 3 feet closer and do it again.
Keep moving 3 feet closer until she finally responds....

If you make a mental note of how close you were when she gives you an answer... 

...that will help me know how bad her hearing loss is."
A few days later I went back to see the same Doctor and he asked, 

"Well, did you do that experiment with your wife's hearing?"

I replied "Yes I did".

"How close did you get before she answered?" he persisted excitedly

"Well, by the time I got about 3 feet away...

...she just turned around and said...

"For the FIFTH TIME... WHAT???"

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel