Lord Noel Asks - Are You Too Corporate?

Whatto! Pepys...



I have recently been interacting with people from large Corporations and I have identified a number of personality traits which may indicate that you are definitely 'One of them'! Check out the list below and test yourself...

You ARE too Corporate if...

1. You ask the waiter what the restaurant's core competencies are.

2. You decide to re-organize your family into a "team-based organization."
3. You refer to dating as 'test marketing'.
4. You can spell "paradigm."
5. You actually know what a paradigm is.
6. You understand every airline's fare structure.
7. You write executive summaries on your love letters.
8. Your Valentine's Day cards have bullet points.
9. You think that it's actually efficient to write a ten page presentation with six other people you don't know.
10. You celebrate your wedding anniversary by conducting a performance review.
11. You believe you never have any problems in your life, just "issues" and "improvement opportunities."
12. You explain to your bank manager that you don't like to think of yourself as "in debt" just "highly leveraged".
13. You end every argument by saying "let's talk about this off-line."
14. You can explain to somebody the difference between "re-engineering", "down-sizing", "right-sizing", and "firing people's asses."
15. You actually believe your explanation in number 15.
16. You talk to the waiter about 'process flow' when dinner arrives late.
17. You refer to your significant other as "my Co-CEO."
18. You start to feel sorry for Dilbert's boss.
19. You believe the best tables and graphs take an hour to comprehend.
20. You account for your children's education costs as a capital expenditure instead of an expense.
21. You insist that you do some more market research before you and your spouse produce another child.
22. At your last family reunion, you wanted to have an emergency meeting about their brand equity.
23. You use the term "value-added" without falling down laughing.
24. You insist that your new car comes with a white board and Internet connection.
25. You regularly give constructive feedback to your dog.

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel