Friday, 4 October 2013

Lord Noel on Always learning

Whatto! Peeps...
A book entitled "How to understand women"

I have compiled this list of things I have learnt over the years...
...and I keep adding new things to it all the time:

1. I think one of a best friend's jobs should be to immediately clear your computer memory if you die.
2. Nothing hurts more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
3. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
4. There is great need for emails to provide a sarcasm font.
5. How the bally heck is one supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
6. Is it just me or do high school pupils get thicker every year?
7. I enjoy eating biscuits whilst trying to decipher that fine line between boredom and hunger.
8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you exactly how the person died.
9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
10. Bad decisions make very good stories.
11. You never know when it will occur, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day... and yet you're expected to remain there.
12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...yet again.
13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of 'Word' and it asks me "Do you want to save any changes made?" to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.
14. If a label says "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" That means I will never wash this - ever.
15. I hate it when I just miss a call by the very last ring grabbing the receiver and calling "Hello? Hello?" to nobody, but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What did you do after I didn't answer? ...Drop the phone and run away?
16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
18. Sometimes, I'll watch an entire movie and suddenly realize: A) that I've watched it before  B) I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
19. I would rather try to carry 10 over-loaded plastic bags in each hand with the plastic cutting into my hands than take two trips to bring my groceries in.

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel

No comments: