Tuesday, 9 June 2009

Lord Noel's Advice On Turning Men Down

Whatto! Ladies............


As I man I can still recall how I used to prowl the clubs and pubs at weekends........

In a romantic effort to meet someone suitable from the 'opposite sex'......

And........... Do you know?........... I would often meeting ladies who weren't interested!.........
(I know that's hard to believe......but it's honestly true!...........)
So always remember Ladies........
......there are ways of letting a man know when you're NOT interested......

............'ways' that will not distroy his fragile ego....

.... FOREVER!

(Here are some of the things you should definately AVOID saying to men............)





HE : Can I buy you a drink?

SHE : Actually I'd rather have the money.
..................................................................



HE : I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.

SHE : I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.
...............................................................................


HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?

SHE : Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.
.............................................................................


HE : How did you get to be so beautiful?

SHE : I must've been given your share.
............................................................................


HE : Will you go out with me this Saturday?

SHE : Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.
............................................................................


HE : Your face must turn a few heads.

SHE : And your face must turn a few stomachs.
..........................................................................


HE : Go on ,don't be shy. Ask me out.

SHE : Okay, get out.
..........................................................................


HE : I think I could make you very happy.

SHE : Why? Are you leaving?
..........................................................................


HE : What would you say if I asked you to marry me?

SHE : Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.
..........................................................................


HE : Can I have your name?

SHE : Why? Don't you already have one?
..........................................................................


HE : Shall we go see a movie?

SHE : I've already seen it.
.......................................................................


HE : Where have you been all my life?

SHE : Hiding from you.
......................................................................


HE : Haven't I seen you some where before?

SHE : Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.
......................................................................


HE : Is this seat empty?

SHE : Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
.......................................................................


HE : So, what do you do for a living?

SHE : I'm a female impersonator.
......................................................................


HE : Hey baby, what's your sign?

SHE : 'Do not enter!'.
....................................................................


HE : Your body is like a temple.

SHE : Sorry, there are no services today.
.................................................................


HE : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.

SHE : If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
....................................................



Whatto!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel
Dress With Finesse

No comments: