Whatto! Historians........
I really don't know what all the fuss is about with History.......
People study it for years and years..........
I feel like telling them to 'Move ON!'..........
There's nothing you can do about it now!.....
I recently read a book.......... on history and came to conclusion that it is all rather simple.......
For those of you who don't wish to waste your whole life studying what has already happened in the past ...............and want to get on with LIVING!.....
......here's a potted history for you.............
"Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and travelled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.
The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.
It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible.
Another important invention was the circulation of blood.
Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. And Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper.
Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but another man of that name.
Magna Carta provided that no man should be hanged twice for the same offence.
The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire's in the East and the sun sets in the West.
The Greeks invented three kinds of columns - Corinthian, Doric and Ironic.
In medevil England times most people were alliterate. The greatest writer of the futile ages was Chaucer, who wrote many poems and verses and also wrote literature. The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet.
Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.
Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ids of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: 'Tee hee, Brutus'.....
Can you do a 'Potted' version of a subject in 20 words or less?
Tallyho!
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