Lord Noel On Lady Jacqueline's New Ring

What ho! Pepys....

My good Lady wife has often chastised me for not buying her a diamond ring.
I explain that it was simply because I omitted the 'engagement' phase and went straight to 'marriage'...
...nonetheless she still mentions it from time to time...
...(every Xmas, Birthday, Anniversary etc etc)
So I was absolutely delighted when I recently discovered a simple yet cunning device named a 'Mood Ring'!
Now my dearest Lady J is of course, perfect in so many ways.....
...but I thought it would extremely helpful to buy her one....
...so that she would at last have a beautiful ring....
...and I would be able to monitor her many mood swings.
Having had the ring for just over a week now....
....I have discovered that.....
...when she is in a good mood....
... it turns green.
And when she is in a bad mood....
....it leaves a big red mark on my forehead.
Maybe next time I will by a diamond!

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel