Lord Noel's Geek Helpline

Whatto! Pepys....

My online Karate classes cost me a fortune!

In an effort to assist humanity I am posting a correspondence between myself and a class of person I have come to love and admire from a distance - commonly known as a 'Geek'.
Enjoy!

"Dear Lord Noel, 
I really want to get a girlfriend but I think the fact that I work in a pet shop may be putting them off. My Mum says I should try telling them that I work in a job that suggests I am embroiled in a world of intrigue and excitement.
So I immediately thought of IT! 
Do you think this would be my best ploy?
I do know a reasonable amount about computers and am on a very high level on 'Candy Crush'. 
Yours
Raymond Stutterford (Mr)
Aged 47"


"My dearest Raymondo,
I couldn't help being drawn to your letter. I'm not sure if it was the fascinating manilla colour scheme or the strong smell of rabbits that aroused my attention.... nevertheless here I am at your disposal!
IT can certainly seem like a fascinating employment to the uninitiated person or 'Geek'...
...but I think most women would find it a bit of a 'turn off'
However.....
....there may be a small group of potential female admirers who....
....whilst initially turned off...
...might be turned on again!
So IT could work!
Good Luck!

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel"