Lord Noel Fought The Law

What ho! Pepys...

I often find myself wondering why we need lawyers.

Everywhere one turns there are laws, and whenever there are stupid laws...

...there are, thankfully, some sensible lawbreakers.

The Law of Common Sense

Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.

The Law of Reality

Never get into fights with ugly people, they have absolutely nothing to lose.

The Law of Avoiding Oversell

When putting cheese into a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.

The Law of Physical Displacement

Sometimes you are the pubic hair on the toilet seat

The Law of Legal Rights

You have the right to be stupid, just don't abuse the privilege.

The Law of Probable Dispersal

Whatever leaves the fan after hitting it will not be evenly distributed.

The Law Pertaining to Divorce

Be a good housekeeper. When you leave him.. keep the house

(Why all lawyers are hated in the first place.)

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel