Lord Noel's Sensitivity Test - For Modern Men

What ho! Pepys.....

I was sent this test which measures how 'in touch with your Masculine side' you are.....
......and I was pleasantly surprised with my results!

Check out YOURS now!

1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:

A.  Lovemaking.

B.  Screwing.

C. Taking the pigskin bus to Tuna Town .


2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you have both shared:

A.  Your views about what you expect  from a sexual relationship.

B.  Your blood-test results.

C. Five Tequila slammers.



3. You should time your orgasm so that:

A.  Your partner climaxes first.

B. You both climax simultaneously.

C. You don't miss the Match on Sky Sports.



4.  Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:

A.  Healthy, creative  love-play.

B. Not the sort of thing your wife would agree to.

C.  Not the sort of thing your wife needs to ever find out about.



5.  Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you have just had sex with is:

A.  The best part of the experience.

B. The second best part of the experience.

C. £100 extra.



6. Your  wife/girlfriend says she's gained five pounds in the last month. You should tell her that it is:

A. Of no influence on your affectionate feelings for her.

B. Not a  problem; she can join your gym.

C. A conservative estimate.


7. You think today's sensitive, caring man is:

A.  A myth.

B. An oxymoron.

C. A complete moron.


8.  Foreplay is to sex as:

A. An appetizer is to entree.

B. Primer is to paint.

C. A long queue is to an amusement park ride.



9.  Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself  saying at the end of a relationship?

A. I hope we can still be friends.

B. I'm not in right now; please leave a message at the beep.

C. Welcome to Dumpsville.  Population: YOU!



10. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:

A.  Probably needs a little more time before she can cope with that sort of  intimacy.

B. Is uptight and a waste of time.

C. Shouldn't  have sat next to you on the bus in the first place..




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Well?.....How did you do?

Evaluating your Results:

If you answered A more than 7  times, check your  pants to make sure you really ARE a man.

If you  answered B more than 7 times, check into therapy. You're a little confused.

If you  answered C more than 7 times, YOU DA MAN!!! (Manly High 5!!)


Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel