Lord Noel Has Philosophical Ponderings

What ho! Pepys...

- A day without sunshine is like...night.

- You never see Giraffes playing leapfrog

- He who laughs last thinks slowest.

- On the other hand, you have different fingers

- I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

- 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

- Remember, half the people you know are below average.

- Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

- If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

- OK, . . . . so what's the speed of dark?

- What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

- Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.

- Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

- Life isn't like a box of chocolates; it's more like a jar of jalapeno's. What you do today, might burn your butt tomorrow.

- Anyone who believes in psycho-kinesis should raise my hand.

Okay smart arse!

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel