Lord Noel's - Tips For Motorists

Whatto! Peeps....

I am often offering our Chauffeur Clive tips on how to drive etc... and because I've accumulated so many brilliant tips ....I thought I'd share some of them with you today!

You can start by enjoying the freedom that a cyclist feels by removing your windscreen, putting a hollowed out melon over your head then jumping red lights, driving on pavements and the wrong way up one way streets.

And why not stick a cut out cardboard ear to the back of your mobile phone? With this simple yet genius device you can make telephone calls whilst seeming to innocently fiddle with your ear.

You can easily make it look as though you are wearing a seat belt by simply painting a black diagonal line across the front of all your shirts.

Tallyho!
Best Wishes - Lord Noel