Lord Noel's Hairy Dog Story

What ho! Pepys....

Lord Noel here....

My neighbour found out that her poor little Schnauzer dog could hardly hear.....
I asked her "Why do you think he's gone deaf?"
...and she told me....
...."Everytime I call it....
....the poor thing just ignores me".
At first I wasn't sure whether the dog was just being really discerning.....
...but she decided to take it to the vet - "just to be sure".
The vet examined the dog and he found that there definately WAS a problem......
....with excess hair in the dog's ears.
He cleaned both ears, and then the dog seemed to be able to hear just fine.
The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that, if she wanted to keep this  from recurring, she should go to the chemist and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears about once a month....
....to stop the problem reoccuring.

So the lady went to the chemist and selected some "Nair" hair remover from the shelf.
At the till, the pharmacist told her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days."

The lady said, "I'm not using it under my arms."

The pharmacist then added helpfully, "Well, if you're using it on your legs, don't shave for a couple of days."

The lady replied, "I'm not using it on my legs either.  If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer."

The pharmacist says, "Oh.... in that case, stay off your bicycle for about a week."

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel