Lord Noel Says 'Happy Birthday Mum!'

What ho!

 Mother!

 Here's a little poem to help celebrate Mothers everywhere....

When my prayers were poorly said,

Who tucked me in me widdle bed,

And spanked me till me ass was red?

......Me Mudder

Who took me from me cozy cot

And put me on me ice-cold pot,

And made me pee if I could not?

.....Me Mudder

And when the morning light did come,

me nappy full (an awful humm),

Who'd wipe me tiny widdle bum?

.....Me Mudder

Who'd comb me hair with centre part,

And draw me gently to her heart,

And sometimes hug me till I fart?

.....Me Mudder

Who'd look at me with eyebrows knit,

And have a crazy king size fit,

When in my Sunday pants me shit?

.....Me Mudder

When in the night their bed did squeak,

Me raised me head to have a peek,

Who'd yell at me to "GO TO SLEEP!"?

.....Me Fadder

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline