Lord Noel Straining One Orf

What ho! Mammals....

I was in the pub yesterday having a spot of lunch.....

....when I suddenly realised.....

.....that I desperately needed to strain one orf.

The music was really, very loud......

.....so I used my magnificently toned sphincter muscle....

....to time the emissions to exactly co-incide with the regular beats of the music.

Obviously the large amounts of Xmas food had taken their toll.....

.....because I was still going strong.....

.....a couple of songs later.

Finally I started to feel better.

I finished my pint and then I noticed something rather odd......

....everybody was staring at me!

"It couldn't have been the smell.."...I thought to myself.....

...."Because my methane smells mainly of roses...."

Then I suddenly remembered......

....I was listening to my iPod.

Tallyho!

May the gas be without you....

Best Wishes - Lord Noel