Lady J Is CHILLED....

Well...today I awoke with my glass of champers & breakfast in bed...my maid opened the curtains to the same drizzle outside, this has been my awakening for almost a week now...the weather is simply Ghastly! Of course I had to do something about this utterly depressing state of affairs, so I had my secretary make me an urgent appointment for a relaxation session at my fav beauty salon.

My Mother, bless her, has recently had a "hip op" (no, this is not a dance...apparently it's when one has one's hip replaced) and she was feeling quite similar....so I took her along for a little therapy too!

We had the most marvellous time! ~My usual room was taken (no doubt by Lady Snooty from the manor close by) so the room allocated was somewhat smaller, reminded me of a windowless cell, but the ambiance was fitting.

First I had the most exhilarating exfoliating back scrub, followed by a sensual massage. Then the pretty little thing, massaged my legs & finally manipulated my aching feet (& believe me, they WERE aching! I had traipsed around the entire city with my Mother & had to carry my OWN shopping ~ Damn butler is away looking after his sick mother, lord knows ~ it's fruitless, the old dear is obviously next to death, perhaps I should recommend my physician, dear Dr. Shipman Jnr. he took care of my last butlers mother a treat!)

Anyway, I diverse!

After our frivolous little treat & bags of shopping later, we decided to head back to the manor...My chauffeur had "knocked off" to go get his teeth fixed, leaving us effectively stranded! We had to go on one of those large tin thingys...a BUS! It was excruciating, all the seats were taken and we were forced to stand with our hands in cuff like devices! There was a brutish looking young gentlemen opposite me, and when the vehicle took a particularly sharp bend, I was thrown (with some force!) with my face, firmly embedded into his moist, stiff, private area! Naturally, I was horrified! It took me 40 minutes to compose myself and become upstanding again.


I've made another booking with the beauty salon, and made my chauffeur an appointment to have all his front knashers veneered to a marble finish....Apparently this is likely to take several hours a week to complete, but I do so believe in giving my staff the best...just such a shame he won't be available to collect me from my weekly beauty therapy trip ;-)

Oh! What a day, after such an ordeal, I feel deserving of a glass of champers and a hot bubbly bath!

Bye for now,
Lady J
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Lady Jacqueline Calls Police!

Well....there I was sitting quietly in the lounge, enjoying a glass of champers & reading a thoroughly interesting book...when I heard the most loud bang somewhere in the local vicinty! Being a Lady and alone in the manor (Lord H was playing a whist game at the local gentleman's club) I was scared out of my wits, I called the Police.

Can you imagine my disappointment when this turned up!

Well, honestly, I felt like a criminal myself when I saw what they'd sent to apparently help me!

A large, gruff & horribly impolite little man.

Naturally, I complained in the strongest terms and called the Private Police...just 3 minutes later, this fabulous policeman turned up....

He had me sorted in no time! & the little darling even brought more champange!

He stayed for...let me think now...5 minutes, or was it 5 hours?....Oh! I really don't recall....but then I was very verrry drunk! ;-)

Here's to a few more loud bangs in the night! Whatto!

Toodle pip for now!

Lady J

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Lord Noel & Lady J On CHAMPERS & BUBBLES!

What ho Pepys!

Well, it's that time of year again when one must start to consider the destination for our Autumn hols! And Oh! the choice! Where does one start? I trawled through the usual mags & suchlike and there are so many places of interest to go, the decision is a difficult one!

We do so love our holidays, such amazing people we have met and bonded with over the years...some are still talking to us...can you believe it!

I remember one particular holiday...Cuba it was...the weather was extremely hot, my skin was just glistening and my versace dress clung to me like a second skin. My back & shoulders ached badly after a day's lounging in the formidable heat. My Lord had gorn off to have a cigar, leaving me to alone to ponder at the stars in the sweltering heat. Eventually, thirst stricken and dripping in pespiration, sheer survial took over me and I headed for the nearest watering hole....and there it was a beautiful, warm blue jacuzzi!

Surely this was the vision of a mirage? But Oh! No! Not only was it real....but....There stood two of the most spendid specimens of man I have ever seen....Was I dreaming? Of course, being a little reticent and shy, I waited a full 5 seconds before ripping off my dress and diving in....the little darlings even had a glass of champers waiting for me!

They were such sweethearts! They rubbed my aching back, and offered a totally new kind of therapy....bending, twisting & stretching oneself into all kinds of strange positions....apparently it opens all your "Chi" bits? Well, it certainly opened mine....I'd never felt so alive! Bless her...even the waitress bringing more champers, was happy to help out and show me how it was done....that's what I so love about these foreigners you know....they are so eager to help and please! Damn shame we let the colonies go if you ask me.

I staggered out not too long later, I think it was about half an hour...or maybe it was an hour and a half? Anyway, I grabbed a large leaf from a nearby tree to cover my modesty, and hot-footed it to our suite, where I had a quick shower and poured myself another glass of champers...just in time for my Lord to arrive back. He'd had his cigar, had gorn looking for me, and deciding I had retired to bed, he trotted off to the casino. Had a little win too!

It was such a memorable night...

well it would have been, had I not been so very, vvvvery drunk!

Damn...I should have at least got a phone number!

Cuba it is then! ;-)

Tallyho!

Best Wishes - Lord Noel & Lady Jacqueline

LADY JACQUELINE & LORD NOEL

LORD AND LADY OF KINGSDALE AT RELAXING AT HOME

Hello all you lovely peeps!


This is my adventure into cyber space with my newly acquired thingmejiggy computor! Of course being a Lady, I'm not used to such contraptions, but whatto! In for a penny...so they say!
Now where to start? Perhaps a little about myself?

Well of course, I am a Lady!
My age....Well it would be improper to divulge that at such an early stage!
Parents? Yes, x 2, still living and breathing...
Children? Yes, x 4 and all immaculately turned out...thank goodness!
Siblings? Yes, x 2 sisters...one older, one younger...both beautiful and talented
Husband? The best...well one would have to be to have stayed with me for all these years...haw haw! My Lord, is not only my husband, but also my fantasy come true (Chippendales....eat your hearts out!), he's also my best friend & confidant...how lucky can one be? Yes, I am a very fortunate Lady indeed! :-)
Home? Yes, I live in a home (but not for the elderly, infirm or insane....yet!)
My interests? Surely that is obvious!?! Clothes, Jewels, Shoes & Handbags....is there anything else?

Toodlepip!
Lady J
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